Another night alone....

Ever feel lost and alone? Well, that's how I feel right now. Living in Calgary, 3000km away from my family...AND my friends is not easy. I don't have a lot of friends out here, so it makes it difficult. Plus Stephan is always away traveling for work. Where we had our German club has been bought by someone else, so until we find a new place to play our group won't be getting together on Friday nights anymore. Today is just one of those days were I'm really missing my old set of friends.

This is what happened. We had plans tonight to hang out with some of Stephan's friends from work tonight, around dinner time. I've hung out with them before, they're great guys, they bring their girlfriends. We thought it was one of those nights, so the plan was for me to go with Stephan. I was out with one of my only friends in Calgary for coffee, and the guy picking us up came early so I had my friend drop me off early. As I was changing upstairs, Stephan found out that it was just supposed to be a guys night and I wasn't supposed to come along. Stephan felt horrible, and told me to still come along. But I felt too uncomfortable, and told him to go ahead without me. He said maybe I should come out later...but I don't really feel comfortable going now. Who really feels comfortable going somewhere when they know they weren't wanted there originally? The biggest thing is now my friend who I WAS hanging out with is busy for the night. And I'm stuck alone in the empty house, again. I can't even open a bottle of wine because I'm picking up Stephan later (its just WAY to far to take a cab, and we have no one who lives in our area to drop him off).

I can't help but think right now what I would be doing on a Friday night if I was home in Ontario with my friends there...I most definitely wouldn't be sitting in a house alone.

Stephan really does feel horrible. But its not his fault, he didn't know. I don't blame him at all, nor am I upset at him. Stephan promised to make it up to me tomorrow with dinner, my choice. But we went out for dinner last night. And while I love going out with Stephan, what I was looking forward to tonight was going out and socializing.

Its just disappointing....what was supposed to be a nice night out on the patio has completely fallen apart.

P.S: sorry for the mopey post.